Sex from the male perspective

Alright, I’m going to dive right in here with my sleeves rolled up and straight up say that when it comes to sex, all of the pressure is on men. And no, I’m not talking about sexualization–I’m talking about the actual act itself. Screwing, fucking, the horizontal mambo, boinking if you’re Bruce Willis circa 1986 (Yes, I dropped an obscure Moonlighting reference). Society may place more pressure on women to be sexual, but what happens after that? When it comes to actually doing the deed, the pressure for good sex is on the man. Have you ever heard of a woman with performance anxiety? No, of course not. Why? Because when it comes to sex, success is dependent upon the performance of the male. Allow me to make the case.

Let’s address the elephant in the room right off the bat. The penis. Cutesy little sayings like, “it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion of the ocean” beat around the bush, so I’ll cut to the chase: size matters.

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I’m sure there’s a happy medium in the penis world, but let me ask the ladies reading this a question. If you were with a guy you really liked–he’s hot, successful, great personality–and you two were finally getting ready to have sex for the first time and he stripped down to reveal a small penis, wouldn’t some part of you be disappointed? Specifically the part of you between your legs. Put another way, would you rather have a dick that’s on the bigger side or the smaller side? I’d be willing to bet money most women would answer bigger.

But wait! The pressure on the penis doesn’t stop there! For some reason, nature saw fit to make the penis single fire. In other words, it gets one shot at sex before there’s either screaming to the rafters or disappointment, shame, and a lot of eating pie at the fridge whilst crying. Yes, there are things you can do in that refractory period between boners to keep the mood going, but come on. Ladies ain’t got no time for a two-pump chump.

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Now think about the things we sexualize when it comes to women. Tits and ass. I can guarantee you that the size of a woman’s boobs or the shape of her ass have never prevented a guy from getting off during sex. There’s no such thing as a woman who doesn’t last long enough in bed either. That last sentence doesn’t even make sense. As long as you’ve got functional parts, you’re basically good to go. Oh, and speaking of functional parts, there’s male impotence. So far the penis is 0 for 3.

Women talk with their girlfriends about sex. That’s a given fact. And why not? There are so many variables involved in how a man delivers. But a man would never ask another man, “How was she in the sack?” It’s almost a moot point. A woman could lie there like a cold fish and 99% of men would still get off, roll over, and go to sleep.

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100% of men agree this isn’t possible

I’ll wrap this up with what I believe to be a rather succinct summary of the anxiety and pressure men face in the bedroom compared to women. Getting a man off is like drawing a stick figure: anyone can do it, it doesn’t take long, and even the crudest approximation will get the job done. Getting a woman off is like painting a piece of impressionist art: it takes awhile, you have to master all the brush strokes, and you need the right technique.

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6 thoughts on “Sex from the male perspective

  1. I have felt this way many times, but I have also had experiences with women who were patient and understanding about how the male anatomy works. Moreover if I were to draw a parallel between those women they would be also more educated about their own bodies. As I think you have discussed before (and to stick with you art analogy) paints a very simplistic picture of a man in general. We are supposed to be rather stick figure like. We are tough, don’t cry or show too much emotion, we know how to please a woman, and we are supposed to please all women we wish to conquer. I think your post here alludes to the problems with that kind of simplistic view of the mail. It might be simply to get us off, but really good sex, that’s no easy task for a woman either. Sex is rarely mind blowing to anyone. The fact that I might have an orgasm, to me, is beside the point. Knowing your views on relationships, I kind of think you wouldn’t mind if someone tried master brush strokes on you, because I am sure in your experience you have had better and worse orgasms and hey why can’t you expect a woman to give you a great orgasm.

    So the other question is why isn’t anybody on the other side of the aisle helping you become a master painter. Now consider how women are in generally treated in society. Many of them are ashamed of their bodies trying to live up to some ridiculous standard set by society. Women are led to believe that desiring sex makes them a slut and it is shameful. Many women have families who would not be supportive of them not having pre-marital sex and apply a double standard when it comes to their son’s sexual exploration, over their daughter’s. And I know a lot of women who have anxiety about letting someone they are even interested in seeing them naked for the first time. And sometimes that anxiety can prevent them from producing enough lubrication for sex. So I am sure there at least some women with performance anxiety. The point is that women aren’t give the same amount of freedom to understand their own bodies to know what really turns them on, and even if they did know what really turns them on they may feel cautious about expressing too much desire for sex to men. Meanwhile the guy is so turned on that he finally gets to have sex with a lady it’s all over quickly and she never really got to find out what worked and what didn’t. 🙂

    So I don’t think that either side has it really easy. I think we just need to get away from these gender stereotypes that really prevent people from having some good goddamn sex! 🙂

    1. I guess I did really generalize here lol, mostly for the comedic effect. I do believe that you’re absolutely right. To me, the key to great sex for both parties involved is communication. You can’t expect the other person to just automatically know what you like and how you like it. The best partners I’ve ever had were women who knew their own bodies and communicated well.

  2. “I’m sure there’s a happy medium in the penis world, but let me ask the ladies reading this a question. If you were with a guy you really liked–he’s hot, successful, great personality–and you two were finally getting ready to have sex for the first time and he stripped down to reveal a small penis, wouldn’t some part of you be disappointed? Specifically the part of you between your legs. Put another way, would you rather have a dick that’s on the bigger side or the smaller side? I’d be willing to bet money most women would answer bigger.”

    I have to bite here… well, not bite… most guys frown upon that. Notice I say most. I have met some pain junkies, but that is neither here nor there. I digress.

    As it happens I have been on both sides of the penis extreme fence. I have had a man get naked only to find a penis that resembled my mini bic; I have also had a man get naked and find myself stunned that this idiot thought that thing would fit in any female who was not a giant.

    Personally, I will take too small over too big any time. Too big is, well, too big. There is no way to enjoy that unless you happen to be the female version of the previously mentioned biting masochist. Thing is though, you have to know how to work it if you happen to stand tall and proud along side my mini bic. Do that and stand tall and proud is what you truly have going for you. Besides, some men get lazy if they have a large penis. I have known some who stand there in their naked glory and it is as though they are waiting for lights to shine miraculously from behind them, illuminating them while trumpets or some shit plays for them. It is though these types figure hey, I brought you this great dick, what else do you want from me? Get to it! Yawn…

    But yes, yes there is a happy medium in the penis world. Good for us that people come in all shapes and sizes.

    Aporia

    1. Thank you for the response! The perspective is greatly appreciated.

      I’m glad that there is indeed a happy medium in the penis world. I’m also glad to hear someone admit that bigger isn’t always better. In fact, I’m convinced that men spend more time worrying about penis size than women do. Most men worry about how they stack up to other guys, and they forget that even an average sized tool can get the job done if used properly.

      And your description of guys with big dicks was hilarious. You just earned yourself a follower!

      1. I agree. It does seem to be a topic that altogether too many men get hung up on. I mean, I have heard slews of women (and men for that matter) carry on and on about how great he (whomever he may be) was in bed. Not once have I ever heard the masses carrying on about his size like Roger carries on about chocodiles. Oh my gawd Francine! The size of his junk! It simply does not happen.

        As for the rest… I am not sure if I should say thank you or say sorry to you for subscribing to my blog. (disclaimer I am not sane)

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